Big Time Truckin: True Trucking Stories
Dispatch 15: CH 9 Emergency Message Examples

by Kirk Gonnsen

Use Channel 9 For Emergency Messages Only

FCC gives the following examples of permitted and prohibited types of communications for use on Channel 9. These are guidelines and are not intended to be all-inclusive.

('Yes' and 'No' examples from Cobra 19 Ultra II CB Radio handbook. 'Maybe' examples from Big Time Truckin King Kirk Gonnsen)

EXAMPLE ONE

YES: "A tornado sighted six miles north of town."

NO: "This is observation post number 10. No tornado sighted."

MAYBE: "Some trucker in the Flying J Truckstop just blew a fart so big, the shit and water flew out of the toilet bowl and soaked his fat man jeans."

EXAMPLE TWO

YES: "I am out of gas on Interstate 95 at mile marker 121."

NO: "I am out of gas in my driveway."

MAYBE: "I am out of cocaine, coffee, and pep pills at mile marker pink lady caterpillar 69."

EXAMPLE THREE

YES: "There is a four-car collision at Exit 10 on the Beltway, send police and ambulance."

NO: "Traffic is moving smoothly on the Beltway."

MAYBE: "Get the fuck out of my way!"

EXAMPLE FOUR

YES: "Base to Unit 1, the Weather Bureau has just issued a thunderstorm warning. Bring the sailboat into port."

NO: "Attention all motorists. The Weather Bureau advises that the snow tomorrow will accumulate 4 to 6 inches."

MAYBE: "Some cocksucker said it's supposed to rain again but I never believe those motherfuckers."

EXAMPLE FIVE

YES: "There is a fire in the building on the corner of 6th and Main Streets."

NO: "This is Halloween patrol unit number 3. Everything is quiet here."

MAYBE: "Hey everybody, say hello to my new friend, Darlene. This is her first time in a Big Truck! Ha, Ha, Ha, HA, HA..."