Hey. Why Not Call Aaron Abrams on the Telephone this Week?

by Aaron Abrams

Hey. I can't think of a column to write for next week. So hey. Call me on the telephone. I will write about our conversation. My number is 416-593-5901. Hey.

Things to talk to me about:

Movies.
Sex.
Anal Sex.
The Eighties.

Or hey. Talk about yourself. Talk about me. Talk about anything you want.

Other Reasons to call:

I'm cool. Seriously. Pretty cool.
People tell me my voice is similiar to that of 'The Cookie Monster'. That might be something to hear.
Relationship Advice.
I might be drunk at the time of your call. That might be something to hear.

Or hey. You know what? Call for you. Call for me. Just call me.
Call Aaron Abrams. Right on the Telephone.

I'll speak to you soon. Take it easy.

Oh hey. If I'm not home? Leave a message at the beep.